I am Israel in the desert

I am reading the Old Testament, specifically the book of Exodus  - zooming it in, pondering upon it, mulling it over and searching my heart in the midst of it. 

So God brought the Israelite nation out of bondage and oppression - he made them a free people, a free nation; out of the yoke of slavery in Egypt into a place where God Himself led the chosen nation by a pillar of cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night. 

Bread from heaven and water from a rock. God even invited them to meet with Him face to face. Not just Moses and a few chosen - the whole group. Yet, they chose to stand afar - have a safe distance. 

Gratitude was not their forte - and the very physical presence of God Himself did not help them excel in the area of giving thanks. Grumbling and complaint was the tune to which their hearts sang day and night. The song of ungratefulness left them wondering in the desert for 40 years. 

I read. I marvel. I wonder and wander. ' How is this possible?' Pillar. Fire. An entire sea split into two - and still they grumble and complain. 

So I said I am searching my heart. If I do the searching - there's only so far that I can go - but if God does the scanning and deciphering... you not just go further into the search and research, but even find yourself longing to flee from all that is exposed.

I am Israel in the desert. 

I will not elaborate on the areas and topics I grumble and complain about. It is not so important - what is important here is that only constant, unwavering gratitude declares that God is truly always good. Victory is always His.

.

Many of you heard that my most favorite place in the whole of Manhattan is Tompkins Square park. 

The park is well known for its residence- the homeless, the drug addicts, the alcoholics, the unemployed, the hopeless, the noisy... 

Well - in this park I met some of the most grateful people on the face of this earth. I could tell stories upon stories about the people I met there - and sure, none of them are perfect - but I have learned so much from just being there, talking, listening and praying for people in and around the park. 

The woman in the picture above - I don't remember her name - but she is Vietnamese. We talked for about an hour in the freezing cold. Her husband left her, family abandoned her. She is raising two sons all by herself, one of them is sick. No permanent job, financial security and/or relative/friend support. Yet - she knows gratitude.  She lives gratitude and knows that God IS good. The stories she told were somewhat unbelievable - but what is most important is that in all the heartache and abandonment - she never forgot to give thanks. 

After our long conversation she left - but 15 minutes later or so she came back looking for me. Why? Because she forgot to ask my name and write it down on her hand so she could pray for me. 

yes. humbled.